Friday, February 26, 2010

How to Affair-Proof Your Relationship (27 February 2010)

Everyone needs to be in love & to stay in love. Whether it is to love your parents, your siblings, your children or your partners/spouses. Love is the reason why it is worth breathing everyday.

This year's overlap of Chinese New Year and Valentine's Day won't occur again until 2048 (the last time the coincidence happened was 1953). It is special to me because it is true to say that you may have found your love in your partner/spouse (or even children) but don't forget to love your parents and siblings because they will always love you. :)

I have found this article & thought it is very useful. So let me share it with you here. :)

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An affair is one of the most difficult challenges a couple can face, and nothing destroys a romantic relationship faster than infidelity. Is it really possible to affair-proof your relationship? The answer is, "Yes, it's possible." But in order to make that happen, it's important to know what causes an affair in the first place.

An affair is an extreme symptom of a relationship that has been in trouble for some time. Affairs do not happen out of the blue and rarely happen because someone is a bad person. Cheating is caused by one single factor: "Lack." In a relationship, it's a lack of love, attention, intimacy, recognition, respect, and connection that builds up over time. Eventually, this "lack" can become so painful that the person in the most pain will often act out by cheating. Because communication has broken down, the cheating person doesn't feel like they can talk to their partner, so that makes them vulnerable to cheating.

So, how do you avoid getting to this point in a relationship? Below are seven ways to avoid the "lack" and prevent a potential affair.

1. Avoid complacency.
Don't ever take your relationship for granted. Partnerships need to be nourished daily by a kind word, appreciation, a loving kiss, a smile. Complacency is a warning signal that you and your partner are out of touch with each other.

2. Keep the lines of communication open. Don't sweep issues under the rug. They won't go away! Learn ways to resolve differences so that recurring arguments don't continue.

3. Pay attention to your gut.
If you're feeling something isn't quite right in your relationship, 99 percent of the time you're correct. Find a way to approach your partner to talk about things. Keep your relationship current by checking in on a weekly basis to make sure problems aren't building up.

4. Find time for each other. Don't get so busy that you forget to have a date with your partner. Make time away from chores and work to renew your loving feelings. Remember how important your mate is to you. Tell them, by making time for them.

5. Know when it's a time of stress and pay attention to your partner even more. Some common trigger times for extra stress in a relationship are job changes, health problems, changes in finances, and the death of a family member or friend. During these stressful periods, pay extra attention to your relationship. Let your partner know you're there, and make even more time to connect with each other.

6. Understand the real issues in your relationship. Learn tools for resolving arguments. Avoid blaming, shaming, and the need to always be right in an argument. Learn what you're really fighting about so that you can resolve your issues. If you're fighting about the wrong thing, you'll never resolve arguments.

7. Always remember what it was that made you fall in love with your partner. Too often we allow our disagreements to cloud our love for our significant other, and we forgot why we even fell in love! Keep your sense of humor. Give your partner the benefit of the doubt and don't make them your enemy.
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Now, let me share with you my V-Day pressies!!! :))) :PPP :DDD
I have in the past received, diamond earrings, bracelet, pendant, etc… But, this is by far the most precious present that I have rec’ed!!! Firstly, it is in my favorite color and secondly it’s my favorite animal!!! It is really the thoughts that count!!! :)))))))















2 comments:

  1. The mirror is super cute!!!!! ^^

    ReplyDelete
  2. Ok ok, I heard "Mmmm...Yum Yum". Does it make a diff? Howcome you know? Yr spirit seems to be following me...

    Ya, our blog no business, end up we comment on each other only... I will try to get more 'business' in April when I will be more free to blog actively.

    BTW, I think we should re-structure our blog into 3 parts:
    1) Food
    2) Travel
    3) Chit chat/thoughts/misc topics
    Any idea on the blog name and how to re-structure?

    ReplyDelete